Who Am I, Really? 

Sarah SoonLove At the Mayo, Monthly Newsletter, Top 10, Writing, Writing Tips

About a five minute read

I experienced an existential crisis as a child. I didn’t know how to embrace my South Korean ethnicity in a predominantly, Polish-Catholic community in Northern Michigan. A Caucasian family adopted my sister and me from South Korea when I was five years old. There weren’t many Asians in our community, so I stuck out. But all I wanted to do was fit in. Shame of my racial features grew that I daydreamed of being a tall blonde with blue-eyes.

Because my family embraced us as though we were biological, I’d “forget” I looked different. But kids, especially at school, reminded me. They’d make fun of my facial features or speak gibberish impersonating an East Asian language, even though I spoke clear English without an East Asian accent.

Most of the kids who teased me were boys. So, back then, I believed that white boys weren’t attracted to me. Ironically, I ended up marrying a white man of Irish descent. When my husband was a teenager, he asked his mom, “Would you be okay if I married a minority?” Of course, she was good with that.

As an adult, I lost that self-consciousness of and shame for my ethnicity. I understood why kids had teased me- I was different, that’s all. Kids tease for a myriad of reasons, so I’m sure you got teased for something, too.

My family have adopted kids and married spouses from other ethnicities. I appreciate how this reflects God’s plan. He doesn’t want us to ultimately unify under a country’s flag, by a particular race, ethnic background, or a political belief, but to transcend them for something eternal.

I don’t define myself as a female Korean American. Yes, I have those attributes, and they can help others understand my background. But if you ask me, who are you? 

I’ll answer, I’m a child of God who’s a citizen of His kingdom. Perhaps, you’re not a Christ-follower and that sounds foreign to you. That’s okay. I’m sharing my identity, so you can understand what defines me.

For you are all children of God through faith in Christ Jesus. And all who have been united with Christ in baptism have put on Christ, like putting on new clothes. There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus,” Galatians 3:26-28 NLT.

Through Christ, we’re united as a family regardless of race, ethnicity, or nationality. It transcends our differences- not that we become homogeneous beings, we still retain our unique expressions-where we can love one another.

By the way, the image is one of my school pics.

Results are In!

Last month, I asked readers: “If you want to interact with Garrett Bettencourt, what would you want to know?”

The poll results show that we have a tie between: (Click on the highlighted words to access the list and the letter.)

* Garrett’s top 10 qualities in a wife. (Garrett wrote this list. Feel free to comment about what you think. And offer any tips for his dating life!)

* A letter about the turning point from Christmas at Sonshine Barn. (Heads up, the letter contains spoilers from Christmas at Sonshine Barn. If you haven’t read this book, I’d hold off on reading the letter.)

And there was also a reader suggestion.

Someone wanted to know Garrett’s favorite hiking spot. Thanks to whoever suggested this!

He couldn’t pinpoint one favorite but loves hiking the Rockies the best (variety of terrains and close proximity to Oklahoma), followed by trails in Yellowstone (especially the wildlife) and the French Pyrenees.

The Cirque de Gavarnie is a favorite hike in the Pyrenees because of the majestic 1,385 foot waterfall, the amphitheater depression of the cirque, the winding Gave river, and the convenience of the four-star hotel nestled in the trail.

Love at the Mayo Update:

I’m working hard on submitting to my editor for line editing. I’m working on the overall story arc, especially after helpful feedback from critiques and beta readers. It’s been a roller coaster ride because I actually wrote the first draft of Love at the Mayo first, then wrote and published Book 1, Christmas at Sonshine Barn after. So, I’ve had to make changes to accomodate the storyline from Book 1.

I can’t waste time wishing I had done differently, but must trudge ahead so the story arc is tight. But for readers who enjoyed Book 1, I promise I’ve addressed unfinished business including Garrett having a happy ending.

Find Your Character’s Voice- An Exercise for Authors:

Last Saturday, I took an insightful writer’s craft workshop about finding your voice and tone. We studied a variety of literary examples and given a few exercises. So, if you’re an author, this exercise is for you.

Ask questions to assess your character’s voice:

1. How do they speak? Loquacious and long-winded? Terse and to the point? Cracking jokes? Using idioms and metaphors?

2. What is their personality like and how does this manifest in their thoughts and dialogue? Are they broody but funny? Caustic and dark? Optimistic and cheerful?

3. What other influences shape their voice? Geographical location, a job or hobby, the influence of other people, culture, family, language etc?

4. Write a few lines of this character introducing themselves to you.

You can read my submission here.

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Photo Credit:

Image of man on ridge Federico Di Dio on Unsplash.

Image of writing/editing quote courtesy of hannah grace on Unsplash.

Image of school work Image by Лариса Мозговая from Pixabay.